Wednesday, August 17, 2011

Defense against name calling

Verbal bullying can be so hard to defend against. In a physical situation there is physical evidence; but in verbal situations it’s “your word against his.” And words—positive and negative—can stick with you for years. I really like the advice from on how to defend against verbal bullying, both in the short-term and long-term.

Teach Kids the Protective Power of Words

Kids tell us that trying to just ignore it when someone says something mean to them doesn't really work. Stop serious name-calling with the same commitment you use when stopping serious hitting. Teach kids to protect themselves from hurtful word by imagining throwing them into a trashcan instead of taking them inside their hearts or their heads.
Teach kids not to let insults, rude behavior, or guilt trips trigger them into feeling intimidated or emotionally coerced by a bully. Kids need to learn how not to let what others say or do control their choices. They also need to learn how not to behave in emotionally damaging ways towards others. Teach kids how to set clear strong verbal boundaries in a respectful assertive way with people they know.

Protecting Your Feelings From Name-Calling

Schools, youth groups, and families should create harassment-free zones just as workplaces should. However, you can teach children how to protect themselves from insults. Tell your child that saying something mean back makes the problem bigger, not better.
One way to take the power out of hurting words by is saying them out loud and imagining throwing them away. Doing this physically and out loud at home will help a child to do this in his or her imagination at school.
Help your child practice throwing the mean things that other people are saying into a trash can. Have your child then say something positive out loud to himself or herself to take in. For example, if someone says, "I don't like you, " you can throw those words away and say, "I like myself." If someone says, "You are stupid" you can throw those words away and say, "I'm smart." If someone says, "I don't want to play with you" then you can throw those words away and say, "I will find another friend."

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